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| Keely at about 2 months old |
Downloaded some pictures from an old memory card in Scotts camera the other day. I came across so many innocent pictures of when we thought our baby girl was strong and healthy. I still consider myself lucky as most SMA babies and parents dont have the opportunity for strong and healthy. We did for four to five entire months. Keely was always so tiny, I would put her in her bathtub but she always looked so small...to small for her tub. She didnt like to be cold either and would cry if she was. I got out my big tupperware bowl (never used for food) and it would keep her submerged in the water up to her shoulders. She liked it and she got a bath on our bed every night before bed. She loved her baths and i loved bathing her....right up until the day she passed she enjoyed them and it was always a fun play time. I still look at this bowl almost everyday as it still sits in our bathroom with all her bath toys and soaps. Not quite ready to make that invisible yet.
Just remembering and seeing some older photos of Keely from an old memory card puts a huge pain in my heart. I sit and I stare and cant believe my little girl is gone. One year and 1 1/2 month later I am still in disbelief and get the sinking feeling in my stomach because I cant change it. I dont quite understand how it can feel like years have past since I held her and yet feel like moments have past when I held her.
I miss her...I miss bathing her and the nice clean baby smell of when her baths were all done. I miss squriting her with her little bath toys and watching her squint her eyes and close her mouth as she waited for me to squirt water at her. And the big huge smile I would get from her as she anticipated me doing it again!
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| might not look like it here but she loved her baths, she loved getting all snuggly in her towel after. |
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| This is my little duckling picture - Nice and fresh. This was after her very last bath the day before she passed. |
